My Dad.

I’m sitting here trying to ‘get my head around’ the words I keep having to say: “My Dad passed away suddenly last night”. It’s just not real but at the same time, it’s too real to let into my heart at the moment.

A very stubborn, highly intelligent, creative man, my Dad was also very private and very opinionated. Always right, he made me laugh with his extreme convictions and lack of empathy in certain situations. Married to his ‘new wife’, Mary, for nearly 50 years, (Mum says it will never last!), Dad has lived a quiet life, happily tucked away in their flat in Bill Quay, where he has painted and drawn, reflected and learned, for so very many years.

Yesterday, he simply went to sleep having been admitted to hospital a few hours earlier, after a heart attack , then the discovery was made that he had cancer and he decided he didn’t want any treatment. So he and Mary laid side by side as Morphine took him gently into a slumber then peacefully, I pray, into the arms of the angels.

The world has stopped but my brain cannot. I’m remembering great days spent with Grandad and Dad  – and hours and hours of just sitting talking to him – rather listening as he ranted on about something or other.

My sister and I have been so very lucky to have had our parents for as long as we have. They were so very young when I was born (17 and 19), that they’ve had the great fortune to live to be great grandparents, seeing the offspring through many generations and enjoying everything they brought.

But there is never enough time, is there? Suddenly, all is still in the reality of great loss.

I am my fathers daughter in every sense and proud to be so –  and I know his strength of character will hold me up on the next part of this journey, as his great love for Mary will keep her strong too.

Thank God for family – and thank you, Dad, for life.