guinea pigs?

The people around me are completely batty! Charlotte Emily Talullah Bucket has shed tears here because she is missing her guinea pig, Nibbles. Now that I can understand – but the two truths below take some understanding!

Tony: has been using “Hob Bright” on his face and body as sun tan lotion then complaining that the cream is a tiny bit abrasive and his tan isn’t deepening! (but at least I can place a pan on him and see a reflection!..)

TwoSheds, our gorgeous friend in Yorkshire, rang me to tell me that she’d found a fantastic new oily spray to help combat wrinkled skin and that she’s found the results to be great! Apparently, her face feels instantly taught and everything “lifts and stays put”!.

Armani, the very lucky but longsuffering husband of this complete lunatic lady, realised how this oily spray worked: it was hairspray and was being used in abundance by (his now very “set” face) Mrs!

The world has gone mad! I’m just going to have to walk around the house backwards, three times and whistle Dixey to protect myself from crazy people and practises, before I go to welcome more guest to villas in Coral Bay!